As a Blogger newbie, I’ve come to enjoy reading others’ Tuesday blog posts. I've decided to give up my TMI Tuesday virginity by posting the weekly quiz here for the first time:
1. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
Britney Spears. It would free up the media to cover something I might actually care about.
2. You seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy crap, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
At a spa, because it could be a nice change of pace to get a massage from someone who doesn’t expect sex afterwards. (Ok, admittedly, I'm usually the one who expects sex afterwards).
3. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
1912, where I would stand on the docks shouting “Don’t get on that ship!!”
4. What is your favorite curse word?
This is like asking a mother which is her favorite child.
5. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
Jude Law. He strikes me as someone who’d be sufficiently inventive.
Bonus (as in optional): You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What's it gonna be?
Invisibility. This way, in the unlikely event Jude turns out to be a dud, I can climb unnoticed into the bed of another, more gifted movie star.
rather than wiping Britney off the face of the earth, how about just sending her my way. I promise I'll keep her out of the media for you! ;)
ReplyDeletehahahaha@ Britney! So true :)
ReplyDeleteI loved your answers! So you're saying you can't pick a curse word???
Sum-agum, dagnabit, holy heck make a gosh dangit decision and choose a swear word...hahaha I guess after an opening line like that you are going to make me adopt Ms. Spears
ReplyDeleteha! love the last answer, funnnny
ReplyDelete1. Kanye West -- Nuff said bout that idiot!
ReplyDelete2. $100 goes to local homeless guy I have in mind.
3. The discussion I had w/ college recruiter I pissed off.
4. MF'r (trying to get rid of that one... thanks to new baby).
5. Jada Pinkett (no details as to why)
6. I love invisibility ... Jada wouldn't know what hit her!
Paula, welcome! Re: Britney -- will do!
ReplyDeleteElle, when pressed to choose a favorite, I'd have to go with the venerable F-bomb. It's versatile, because it works purely as a curse, but also as a plea for action. Come to think of it, so does "sh*t", but no one wants to encourage *that* particular action!
FG Sakes, Fine, I chose (see above). Interestingly, you're the 2nd person here out of five offering to keep Britney occupied. Apparently, the world does not share my Spears fatigue!
Hi Barefoot -- ever since I posted this and read everyone else's last answer, I've wanted to change mine! My mind only focused on the traditional superpowers, but some blogging folks have invented some new, cooler ones, which I didn't think to do!
Dayne,
1. Kanye was a finalist for my #1
2. Aww you are awesome!
3. Oh no! Will that story be a future blog post?
4. Smart move. The thing about kids is, even when they don't know what something means, they absolutely learn to recognize a bad word, and of course, want to then repeat that word over and over in an effort to get a rise out of adults!
5. No details needed. (We assume it's because you have eyes).
6. Ha! You'd better be invisible, so Will can't find you!
Heck, I'll give you a massage for free! Oh wait, you're right . . . I'd be expecting sex afterwards . . .
ReplyDeleteBy the way, what's up with the panties picture? You know, it really is a shame you have to use a set of panties as your blog picture and tell sex stories to get someone to read your blog!
;-)
Hilarious stuff. Oh and Riff took the words right out of my mouth - about the massage part.
ReplyDeleteBut Britney isn't that bad is she? She's looking good these days. Its Kevin KFed that's looking like a real fat idiot. I can't believe he transformed himself into lazy with all of Britney's money.
Riff Dog! Too funny! If I had more of an exhibitionist streak, I'd replace the pic of my panties with a pic of my boobs, just to see if I could incite another offended email.
ReplyDeleteDewey, I just chose Britney to free up the airwaves for more interesting topics. Kinda like a public service on my part!
Ooh! Cool blog you have here.
ReplyDelete:)
LoL! And yes, I can certainly see how invisibility would have it's perks.
Thanks Wintersinger!
ReplyDeleteYou are hilarious (and hilariously frisky). Wonderful! I especially enjoyed the one about the curse words...
ReplyDeleteIgnore complaints about your panties. They probably downloaded them!
ReplyDeleteSecretia
Welcome Secretia!
ReplyDeleteAs for my panties pic, it could've been worse. At least I photographed them without me in them!
I sooo wish you could have
ReplyDeletethe kinda accident I had [NDE]
THEN! you'd know our lifelong
demise is only a litmus test
to see which direction we'll
go at our Final Judgement.
Check-this-out:
Yes, earthling, Im an NDE
so I actually know God exists:
He rewards those who HONOR n RESPECT
Him and strive to follow His Laws;
for those who wanna know what
Seventh-Heaven holds for your
indelible, magnificent soul whom
God has so carefully crafted:
Find-out what RCIA means and join.
trustNjesus.
ALWAYS.
God bless your indelible soul.
PS denying Hell will not prevent
U.S. from falling INTO Hellfire:
Jesus is the Just Judge;
He only 'reads' what OUR past,
mortal lifetime consisted of.
so... I'd strongly urge you to read
'Lui et moi', too, by Gabrielle Bossis
(a French writer, translated, into
crystal-clear-100,000W-GE-prose -
a must have for anyone who's gotta
grow-UP in our predestined
relationship determined by YOU).
Make Your Choice -SAW
Dunno if you saw this before...
Deleteyet, here it is once moe, curly:
Greetings, earthling! Need summore new-fangled-thots N ideers? Look no firdr, brudda. Can't stay long. Done gotta git, Paw... yet, if Im a sower, we plant the Seed; if Im an artist, we RITE the Word: Would U please help a plethora of King Size, wildchild, rawkuss poetry/wordz which are lookin 4 a home in thy novelty?? Thx. Whew. They're pretty insane. They're bereft of reason. Oi! Blimey! They're bloody PINK spiders!
Gotta gobba lotta shrewd, surreal, supersonic, sardonic satires, sassy N savvy elixers N electronic elegance (and palpable nuance) on our YOUTHwitheTRUTH blogs. Wannum? Have'm. N'joym. Gettm outta my hair!!!How mucha wanna betcha our sugar-high-mojo, pleasure-beyond-measure, fuse-blowin-exploits R a copious madhouse of one lavish bookay D.O.A.? Our proFUSE NRGod who leads U.S. to explosive fairy-tales in the 'one-stop-shop' symphony Upstairs? Almighty God's the BigDude, the Owner of ElysianFields, the Grand Prize, the Austere Overdrive, NoPurchaseNecessary: our bombastic tenaCITY on a Hill which'll plant the Seeds 4u2 grow-up to new N greater heights!! Mama mia! Thatsa good pasta!!
CAUTION: our 22ish, avant-guard, accurately-atrocious, offa-the-reservation-like-Jimmy-Hoffa, metal breadcrumms R sooo out-of-order, toots, they're an intimate wealth of bottomless sophistication. And dats da lethal fak, Jak. Yeah. Go ahead. Sue me. Yawn. But, yet, here's the perennial KOO D'TAH: who else has actually SEEN the Great Beyond in spirit & lived to tella youse bout the bionic, bloated, brevity-like-earth we're living on?? Yes, earthling, Im an NDE, almost salivating4salvation. So gain altitude, never attitude: death has no intrinsick favorites.
If Mr. abSUREditty's an ultra-great-reward, and not everyone enters, Q: why is it an excruciating deluge of epic-.357-caliber where the quality's a limitless bulldozer plowin, pushin-your-power-cord with eternal goodies? A: the Prize-A+-TheEnd just gives U.S. moe-curley-graphix 2 VitSee: an explosion-of-extravagance which few R asking 4 anymore! Grrr. They're too concerned withe grotesque sanity of ambivilant piss-ants which swiftly crawl like lemmings to their scorecard destruction. C'est la guerre.
THANK GAWWWD!!! the Don has the ebullient BAWLS!!! to do the Manifest Destiny!!! To lead U.S. forward to the White House Upstairs with his SQUARES!!!
So, break-free, earthling; be like a contraversial outgrowth of incredibly-intoxicating-effusiveness in your zeitgeist to give the ultimate, stunning, backknuckle potency: Wiseabove. Wanna join this useFULL idiot Upstairs 4 the most zany, kooky, X-acto-knife antidotes? Extremely exquisite, explicit endorphins in abundance? Puh-lenty of pulverizingly-tantalizing psychopathic psychosomatics with eXtras? i2i-kick-velocity's-ass-ultra-maximum-rocket-fuel-party-hardy at my pad ya ever encountered without d'New Joisey accent 4 an eternal slew of precarious, magnanimous & primeval absurdities indelibly etched in the granite corridors of eternity with a total-barrage-of-melt-in-thy-mouth 'depth-of-undenial'???
Make Your Choice -SAW
...cuzz nobody gitts outta here alive, earthling.